The motherlode

After today's M&M post I decided to visit this portal to hell and it was well worth the trip! See some of the horrors that I discovered (colored boldface added by me to enhance your experience):

A remarkably realistic lifelike baby doll has reached the absolute pinnacle of achievement among the world-famous collectible So Truly Real® dolls. For the first time ever, a premiere collectible baby doll has been given all the adorable animated features of an actual baby. She turns her head, she closes her eyes slowly as she falls asleep and she even sucks on her pacifier!

Available exclusively from The Ashton-Drake Galleries, each of the poseable plush kittens in this collection by renowned miniatures artist Darlene Austin are beautifully crafted and wonderfully detailed. And each is covered with soft, hand-applied mohair fur, patterned so that no two kittens are exactly alike - just like in real life! They even come in adorable baby outfits with their names on the fronts. Furr-ocious demand is expected for this first-ever collectible miniature kitten doll collection, so order now!

Designed by acclaimed artist Lydia Marlene, the winsome simian sweethearts in this darling figurine collection are cast in artist's resin and hand-painted in wonderful detail, right down to their adorable baby faces. Small enough to fit in the palm of your hand (just 4-3/4" tall), they're too cute for words with their little bananas, curly tails and tiny topknots tied up with strands of genuine mohair. They even wear real fabric diapers! Treasure them forever or enjoy giving them as lovable collectible monkey-lover gifts, but hurry! Demand for these unique miniature monkey collectibles is sure to be high, so don't monkey around - order now!

Had enough? If not, visit the site now and buckle up, 'cause it's a doozy.


jamwall said...

She turns her head, opens her eyes, projectile-vomits M&Ms, kills a priest, etc.

Butchie said...

That monkey is so fucking vile.